anxiety dreams

I often have anxiety dreams, though it wasn’t until quite late in life that I realized that’s what these were.  Dreams where my teeth are loose or fall out, or more commonly where I’m driving and my car has NO BRAKES.  When that starts happening I know that there’s something going on in my life that I’m stressing about — but I never have those stress dreams about the actual event.  I’m never naked at my thesis defense, or at school without my homework, though I do often find myself in perplexing situations without necessary items, like on the savannah without a car.  None of my anxiety dreams seem to represent actual, real-life problems — except the teeth falling out one. I have terrible teeth.

The one exception is horse show anxiety dreams.  I have horse show anxiety dreams that are about actual horse shows, and while the scenarios in them aren’t exactly realistic, they aren’t far off.  More than once I have dreamed that I’m trotting down the centerline or cantering out of the start-box and Murray disappears from beneath me, and there’s nothing for it but to do the test or course on foot.  Weirdly, this has never dream-happened to me regarding stadium.

A few nights ago I dreamed that I couldn’t find my white stock tie, and the only tie I could ride in was a black, straight, men’s tie*.  It was mortifying!  To top it off, I spent a good three hours getting ready, and with about two minutes to my ride time I looked into Murray’s paddock to see that he was filthy, unbraided, and totally un-tacked.  I promptly woke myself up from that one.

* A straight, brown men’s tie was part of my winter school uniform from ages 6-13. I got quite proficient at tying a half windsor in my youth.

Before the July Camelot even in 2015 I had a ton of anxiety dreams, but the best one was also about a stock tie!  This time I needed to pick up a stock tie about 3 hours before my ride time — reasonable, right?  So we went to the local JoAnn’s fabrics — because that’s totally where one gets stock ties — and I hemmed and hawed over fabrics and finally picked a fabric and was ready to make my stock tie.  But I wasn’t allowed to use the sewing machines at the back of the store! (For those of you unfamiliar with JoAnn’s fabric, communal sewing machines are not something they typically feature.)  I somehow got my stock tie made/finished/purchased (it was some kind of glittery silver fabric, I know that much), but by that point my ride time was LOOMING upon us and the show venue was 45 minutes away.

So apparently I have serious anxiety surrounding stock ties?  I’d better make sure mine is finished (crafting it this weekend!) and packed well before we leave for Twin!

16 thoughts on “anxiety dreams

  1. dreams are so weird. I have some pretty crazy ones, especially anxiety ones. Generally mine are closer to the subject. Strange thing, having M disappear out from under you. I have had a dream like that before. I am not going to tell you the story because it is a sad story. You and M have a happy story!


  2. I have anxiety dreams, usually I’m being chased by something. Or if it’s horse-show-themed, either my pony turns into a little toy horse underneath me, or I run so late that I miss the entire show.


  3. My dreams are bonkers. I can usually identify what the dream is saying but sometimes… well I just have a really good imagination. It’s good that you know that they are caused by anxiety now though. It must have added to your stress before when you’d have dreams like that.


      • I can’t decide if I’d rather have dreams where stuff happens to me, ala your teeth dreams, or the ones that I have where a various family member/friend is hurt/dying. Both sound pretty terrifying.


  4. omg omg omg plz to send me pictures of your crafty stock tie!!!!! (did i send you pictures of mine?? bc i totes will and we had so much fun making them altho i seriously wondered if the design was flawed about half way through haha….)

    also. anxiety dreams. ugh. in mine, my teeth are broken, not loose. like, with this weird powdery crunchy jagged sensation and taste (ew).


    • You haven’t sent me pics of yours but I saw it on your blog! I want in progress pics though! I will definitely send pics, I have a few ideas I might try to get through this weekend!!


  5. Oh no, this is me too. Random stupid anxiety dreams, but the horse show ones are much more reality based…like I just cannot get myself organized or dressed in time to ride, or I forgot to send in entries or my tests or the trailer is broken down.

    The teeth falling out thing…yeah, once it gets to that point I’m like “RED ALERT, wake up, we now can confirm this is just a stupid dream!”


  6. Lol, the teeth falling out ones are the worst, I abhor the dentist! I always have anxiety dreams, often about work, Because after a full shift, who doesn’t want to work more in their dreams?! Love the stock tie anxiety. ITs so crazy how we process stuff in dreams.


  7. I have a recurring dream (I’ve had it for years) that appears in the weeks before something I’m dreading/nervous about/worrying about. I’m cantering a courtesy circle on a horse I don’t know at all and the announcer reads my name out and the buzzer goes off and all I know is that this is important. This ride matters more than any other ride I’ve ever laid down. And we come cantering around to the first fence. It seems like it gets bigger as I ride down to it. By the third fence, it’s evident that my horse is shrinking until finally I’m running along holding my horse up between my legs and trying to jump the fences on my own two feet.
    All that to say, I think you’re gonna rock it and I can’t wait to hear about it 🙂


  8. I’ve never had a horse show related anxiety dream, but my tooth dream stopped once I got a good dental plan. I’d just reason it away in my dream “oh you made it this long without a cavity or anything.. good thing you have dental insurance and you can get a fancy new tooth put in!”


  9. I have also had the teeth anxiety dreams. (so has my sister) They progressed from loose teeth that eventually fall out, to handfuls of tooth shards with little splinters left in the sockets when I looked in the mirror. Always super happy to wake up from those dreams. Feeling better that so many others have them too ;D


  10. I love that you shared this! LOL I usually don’t remember my dreams, but I had one a few days ago involving Tiznow. I was in charge of him (!) and had to turn him out in my grandma’s paddock (my grandparents had horses, but before I was born–there was no paddock or pasture in the area on her property where the Tiznow paddock was located). After he’d been outside for several hours I realized his gorgeous coat was going to fade in the sun and I rushed outside, without a lead rope. I saw he was OUTSIDE of the paddock, GRAZING right next to a road with traffic! I grabbed his halter and led him with no problem into my grandma’s house. Right up the front steps and into the front door. So weird. Thank you for letting me share.


  11. I seriously thought I was the only one that had reoccurring nightmares about my teeth falling out (I also have bad teeth) and having no brakes. PSYCHOLOGY. I’ve also had a handful of school/horse show ones too.


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